I don’t know what people do in their houses by Angela Shier

                Cats hang out in a box. That’s what they do. How else can they really live? Angela transforms into a cat since she’s an animorph. Few people possess this rare talent. Yet when you see Angela’s face know she can morph into a cat upon command. Her ability to adorably say ‘Boost’ can be attributed to this rare talent. 

                Hugs make some people sick. Not me I say bring on the hugs. A few have died of hug overdoses. Love was not in their hearts. I am prepared to die for affection. This sounds like a good way to go. It is certainly better than dying alone in a retirement home manicuring one’s nails. Avoid that fate. Die old and die loved. Portland is a retirement community of young artists. Without hugs Portland’s economy would collapse.

                5:00 am is a weird time to go home. Riding bikes at 5:00 am you get a lot of freedom. Dress the way you want to, have Angela Shier put it into a chapbook. Wonder if the person with the lit-up Christmas wreath on his head will read Angela’s work and see himself in it. Find it very likely. Alt lit and bicyclists are usually the same person. 

                Morpheus knows all about Angela’s past as Squidward. Squidward is, for those unaware, the most EMO character on Spongebob Squarepants. He works at the Crabby Patty with Spongebob. Is Angela Shier the Squidward of alt lit? She does have a collection of dolphin watches. That indicates a love of the sea world. Maybe she was fine in the sea and it is time to throw her back in. 

                She climbs through a second story window. Angela lives the squatting life. Contrary to popular belief squatters have it hard. Think it is easy to occupy abandoned buildings? Think again. People enjoy boarding up homes. I never understood why they’d do that if there are all these people without homes. Property can be so cruel. 

                The moon is the night. What else goes on with the moon besides the tides? Sun provides warmth, comfort, and summer fun. People rarely remember the moon, Werewolves and Insomniacs excluded. Pancakes are the new bandages. Blood goes on the pancakes of the damned. They really enjoy the taste. Vampires live in America; they pay taxes and are good people. If they could just avoid sucking blood they’d be perfect. 

                A storm approaches her house. She is driven in a Minivan by Michael Phelps, swimmer, lovers, and driver towards the future. ‘HEHE’ ends the chapbook. That’s Angela signoff. Wish more chapbooks had signoffs. Right now Angela controls it. Check it out. Feel the warmth radiating from her Pacific Northwestern smile.