Beach Sloth

Internet People IRL

                Peterbd continues his transcribed, minute by minute details of his time with the alt lit gang. Here he meets a few additional folks. When we last saw him he was straight up chilling at Shaun’s place. Now he has moved to the most welcoming alt lit place ever – a local bar. Bars support alt lit even more than alt lit supports itself. Alt lit is an alcoholic. Don’t worry though, it is a benevolent alcoholic. 

                A picture of Jackson Nieuwland and Carolyn DeCarlo greets us. I swear by my earlier statement: Jackson and Carolyn are the alt lit couple of 2012. Come on, try to outdo their cuteness. Can you? I sincerely double-dog doubt it. Peter states your soul mate is a click away. I agree. I met my wife on ‘Live Jasmin’. Now we’re happily married. I don’t look at her through a screen anymore. 

                Buttercup pretends to be interested in some stupid game I don’t even care enough about to research. Sports are not my thing. Lit is my thing. Once you’re lit you never quit. Alt lit is like the mob, if the mob was into distributing literature for free online instead of brutally crushing competition. Some in alt lit brutally crush competition. See ‘HTML Giant’ for more on that. In fact, go to HTML Giant to see my lovely write-up of Michael Seidlinger’s book ‘The Sky Conducting’. 

                Shaun hugs when he’s drunk. I like Shaun’s hugs. His love of Dad rock is an additional plus. Dad rock is one thing Shaun and I have in common though I basically listen to every type of music except Tuvan throat singing. Been trying to get into Tuvan throat singing for a while, the closest I got was late-period John Fahey albums. 

                The local town benefactor, Bart, buys everybody songs. Shaun loves this guy. I do too. Anybody who gives out $20 to pump into a jukebox is alright with me. Benefactor Bart is a nice guy. Peter alleges Jae and Buttercup are ‘into each other’ via sitting next to each other. I wonder if that is true. I have never met Jae. I have met Buttercup since he lives in Baltimore. Hope true alt love finds them. Maybe love is sitting right next to you right now. Turn around. That’s your next partner in love.

                We see Shaun Gannon’s girlfriend. Peter states she came into the room and shouted ‘I AM SHAUN GANNON’s girlfriend’. Then she proceeded to speak at a normal volume for the duration of the meeting. Happy to see Peter is willing to photograph these wonderful meetings. Maybe one day I can become the alt lit photographer. It looks like Peterbd is the master of that. Tune in next time for tales of extreme fist fights in the alt lit world.